Wednesday, April 23, 2014

Stepping outside

I started up another blog to wright about life outside of surrogacy.

25 weeks 15 or so more to go

We went to the park the other day and we took a few pictures. Nothing too extravagant just some for fun.                                         

He wants a brother not a sister (it was bright out)

24 1/2 weeks

 So far everything with this pregnancy is going well. Had a little fall last week after our ice storm but the only thing that got hurt really was my arm and my pride lol. Went and had a check up with an ultrasound just to be sure and Lillian is growing perfectly. Still some fluid in her kidneys but not to where we are majorly concerned. It usually clears up right before birth or shortly after. We are just watching it.My cervix is a little soft but still closed.
Weight: Ive gained a total of about 13 lbs (giver take the day lol). Which is great! I didn't gain anything for Finn. He sucked it out of me..
Health/Movement: She is moving like crazy. I can see her now on the outside of my belly. Especially after some ice-cream. Im doing really well. Hardly any heart burn. A little contraction here and there but nothing concerning. Normal stuff Im just sensitive to feeling them when others usually dont. My nerve has been a pain more so at night. so the heating pad is my friend.

Sam text me the other day with Finn's Birthday party info. HOLY ONE YEAR!!! Nope cant happen. She needs to talk to that boy about growing up so fast. =P
Im already brainstorming birthday gifts. I am planning on another Finn book (a book with his name in it with a note inside) and a gift for fun. I have a pretty good idea what its going to be. Oh Im Giddy just thinking about it.

Here's little man and Mommy, 2 weeks shy of being 10 MONTHS OLD! I cant even describe the words that pictures like these make me feel. When days are hard or something gets me down I look at my kids and what happened with our Journey and it reminds me whats important.

Mothers day is coming up here next month. That's when we went to the cities and had a 4D ultrasound of Finn..

Remember to love up your mothers and pray for those who struggle with trying for a child. Its something so many take for granted.

Monday, March 31, 2014

20 weeks no wait 21... ummm

Ask of our ultrasounds and my last menstral cycle says that I'm due August 10th.I had one ultrasound in the beginning with the twins that showed a later due date so ultimately we are not sure when this little girl is going to be here. She's measuring 21 weeks and is super super active... and I'm feeling great!

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

20 weeks oh MY!

This Friday I will be 20 weeks pregnant with our baby girl. So much has happened the last few months but at the same nothing much at all. For a while I was having contractions and pains just like Finnegan. Went in a few times to the clinic and they confirmed but there was nothing much I could do but be on modified bed rest. So for the last 4-5 weeks Ive been taking it easy and only picked up one shift at the nursing home last week.  I did a short shift and paced myself. (even tho I was told I wasn't) lol.

And besides being sore from my nerve I did good. A few little cramps but nothing I would be concerned about so this next month I already filled up my calender with some shifts. I'm not sure what made my pregnancy with Finn so touchy but this one is starting to ease up a bit. Ive eliminated alot stress and that's helped greatly and I tend to ask for more help around the house (which I DONT do) and thats helped with the extra lifting and bending. This little girl is growing like a weed. Ive been feeling her kick for some time now and the last 2 weeks I have been able to feel her on the outside of my tummy.                               Here is a 19 1/2 weeks picture of me

19 1/2 weeks with our baby girl

20 weeks

16 weeks 

I can't believe he's going to be 9 months on the 5th. Here are some pictures I saved from mommys pages and some she has sent to me... the kids like to see him from time to time

Little man loves to eat and from what mommy says he is so close to walking. I'm so lucky I am able to watch him grow up not many other surrogates gets get to be as lucky. And what can I say I like showing him off just like my own..I can't help it look at those chubby cheeks hehe

We have our 20 week ultrasound this Friday and we also get to confirm once again its a girl. I already have her bed room all set up besides a few little things here and there and some more clothes.                I'm prepared just in case it turns into anything like Finnegan.

The kids are doing great. Going to school and waiting... waiting .. waiting for summer. I cant wait to clean up my garden and get started on some yard work in the warm sun shine!!

Friday, January 17, 2014

New year

Happy New year everyone.. I know it's a little late but at least it's not weeks lol. Well I had another U/S and one of the twins stopped developing. It was a flash back of Finn but much earlier then with him. It was hard... extremely hard. I keep having dreams about both twins and my mom and papa. I have cut people out of my life and I must say it's really cleared my head and helped me see what I need to do and where I need to be. I'm still working as an on call and hours are few and far between, I'm looking at other options because of it.....

Online classes
Daycare (even over nights)
Different nursing home
Even Looking into changing up my whole career choices...

I've been praying hard about all this and so much more.

New year's kids I baby sat

Christmas gifts from Sam and the family
I'm starting to really show and my tummy is getting harder. I'm craving spicy foods and tons of fruit. Anything fruity really. Healthy and not so much like fruit snacks lol.
So far now unless I'm stressed I hardly ever get nauseated. I do get light headed when I stand up and I don't remember that happening much until later on in my previous pregnancies. It's so true each one is different but some things stay the same. At this point I would guess a girl. I'm ok with what ever ;)

I already have my heart set on first names but I'm still keeping an open mind to other ones.

I think this time we will keep the sex a secret... let's see if I can do it!

Monday, December 16, 2013

we have some exciting news

We are pregnant! AND it's TWINS. Twins run in my family so this doesn't surprise me. I am very shocked and I  have mix emotions with the timing but leaving it all up to God. This is HIS plan. It brings me back to being pregnant with the twins before and I'm so afraid of losing one like Sam lost one of hers. I almost feel guilty it's TWINS. I don't know if this is normal or not but what is my life? Far from normal that's for sure. I am sick all the time but not as often as before. Every thing else is the same. Acne weight gain some days loss others. Now we wait. I go back the Friday after Christmas for another ultrasound. I'm always expecting bad news so pray for peace.

Staying busy at the Y

Olivia turned 4. Can't believe my baby is 4

Painted my bathroom. So much better then the ugly blue

Tuesday, November 26, 2013

giving thanks

Everything here has been going smoothly. A year ago Sam was busting with excitement of the twins and now finny is here. I can't believe it. We are all doing great. We went to Fargo a few weekends back to get pictures done by Sam. They turned out amazing. He is one good lookin boy. Chunky and full of cuddles. We went to dinner and talked about the last year. Finding out a lot of my thoughts and feelings are the same as hers. Still sharing the same thoughts and feelings like when I was pregnant. Moments I treasure.

Then after I went for another visit but this time for a damsel in distress party. Something like that. They sell stuff for self defense. I bought a taser..hehe. Here are SOME of the pictures I got.

Such a wonderful mommy

He wasn't having the bottle yet that was for sure

Smiles for manda

I got quiet snuggle time with him too. It's moments like these that I am so blessed I have. Not many surrogates get this opportunity to have this close of a relationship with their families and surrogate baby. I get sad here and there missing Sam's close companionship when I was pregnant but I know that that was part of the deal. And I still have so much more then so many others so for that I am THANKFUL. This little boy has so much love pouring onto him he will never know what it is to be alone or unloved.Watching Sam work her magic taking care of him ...priceless. Still no motherly bond or needyness from me. I was more the ok he's not happy go to mommy feelings lol. I'm anxiously wanting to be pregnant again. In a weird way.. I can't wait to give him his Christmas gifts.

Well I'm still waiting to see what happens with my health. My heart stuff has acted up again. A trip by ambulance multiple tests ekg a stress echo and back on beta blockers. We are working our way to hopefully figuring this crap out soon. Heart palpitations pvc's pva's pain. It may all be ok and not dangerous just could be more. I'm not sure yet. My Dr is even stumped since some of what's happening to me she hasn't even seen before. So prayers are definitely appreciated. 

A few months back I got a call from Sam saying on the minds of moms was doing a story on her and wanted me to do an interview. I said sure. I emailed them and answered all their questions.

It turned out amazing. I can't wait to get a paper copy. Eee

Well I'm off to bed. I hope every one has a wonderful Thanksgiving.